If something bad happens, ask yourself "What next?" a few times, it can move your focus past the most distressing part of the scene and take away its catastrophic appearance. I.e what would happen after losing your job? It might be tough for a while but eventually you would find something else and your life would move on. The technique of exposing yourself to stressful situations repeatedly in small doses so that you build up a more general resistance to emotional disturbance is known in behavioral psychology as "stress inoculation"

The only problem with the Stoics is that when they are taken in their raw form, they can be unacceptably bitter to modern tastes. In How to Think Like a Roman Emperor, Donald Robertson sugars the pill a little, making it digestible. He uses the teachings of Marcus Aurelius and other stoic philosophers as a foundation, and then builds a structure of modern techniques for finding peace and self-improvement on top of it. I've noticed that over the past few years books about Stoicism have really been proliferating. As traditional religion seems to ebb, I think people are looking for guidance to morality and the good life, and a surprising number of them are finding it in an ancient philosophy that was highly popular in classical Rome. The Stoics give modern people a moral code that doesn't look too different from the one they grew up with, but it bases its ethics on reason rather than revelation and dogma. How to conquer desire. Difference between external pleasure and deeper sense of joy which comes from achieving your fundamental goals in life and experiencing fulfillment. Using the life of Marcus Aurelius, Robertson – a professional psychologist – try to show how we can surpass emotional obstacles that hurt us. Most new Stoicism books try in a perfidious fashion to 'modernise' Stoicism - presenting it as some sort of a 'Western yoga class' - which is not only wrong, but in the end makes a really unpersuasive argument for being a modern Stoic (why do the copy, do the original yoga).Specifically, he looks at how stoic philosophy provided Marcus Aurelius as a coping strategy for his role as the emperor. Marcus Aurelius is one of the few good Roman emperors, especially compared to Caligula or Nero. The author looks at the links between therapy and stoic wisdom.

This is what makes How to Think Like a Roman Emperor by Donald Robertson an ideal introduction to the practice of Stoicism. It combines the theory of Stoicism—corroborated by the latest therapeutic techniques of modern psychology—with the biographical details of a Stoic master worth emulating, Marcus Aurelius. I was totally unprepared for his death, and I coped with it badly. I became angry and depressed. I’d stay out all night, playing cat and mouse with the local cops, breaking into buildings and waiting for them to arrive so I could run into gardens and dive over hedges and fences to lose them. I was always in trouble, either for skipping lessons at school, arguing with my teachers, or getting in fights with my classmates. As soon as my sixteenth birthday came around, I was marched briskly down to the headmaster’s office and given two choices: either leave voluntarily or be expelled. So I left, and I was subsequently placed in a special program for troubled kids. I felt that my life was spiraling rapidly out of control. I’d been labeled a “write-off” by school and social services. I didn’t really see any point trying to prove them wrong. In the first chapter you will learn about the general idea of Stoicism (philosophy) and how does it differ from stoicism (mental trait of toughness). Although Marcus first began training in philosophy when he was just a boy of about twelve, his practice intensified in his mid-twenties, when he dedicated himself wholeheartedly to becoming a Stoic. Since then he has rehearsed his Stoic exercises daily, trained his mind and body to obey reason, and progressively transformed himself, both as a man and a ruler, into something approaching the Stoic ideal. He has tried to develop his own wisdom and resilience systematically, modeling himself after the philosophers who shared their teachings with him and the other great men who won his admiration, foremost among them Antoninus. He studied the way they met different forms of adversity with calm dignity. He carefully observed how they lived in accord with reason and exhibited the cardinal virtues of wisdom, justice, fortitude, and temperance. They felt the pain of loss but did not succumb to it. Marcus has been bereaved so many times, has practiced his response to it so often, that he no longer weeps uncontrollably. He no longer cries “Why?” and “How could this happen?” or even entertains such thoughts. He has firmly grasped the truth that death is both a natural and inevitable part of life. Now that his time has come he welcomes it with a philosophical attitude. You might even say that he has learned to befriend death. He still sheds tears and mourns losses, but as a wise man does. He no longer adds to his natural grief by complaining and shaking his fist at the universe.A fascinating history of Aurelius and his beliefs, and an insightful consideration of how they inform the practice of modern mindfulness." — Publishers Weekly Every chapter at first describes some part of Marcus's life and then the chapter continues with lessons from Stoicism. Every lesson teaches us something different and valuable for our lives.

Stoic philosophy is arguably one of the best teachings in terms of how to conduct ones mind, behaviour and over all well being in our day to day lives and Donald Robertson’s book is a great introduction into that field of teachings. Stoicism therefore embraces the original Greek conception of philosophy as a way of life, a subject matter to be practiced rather than simply studied. Far removed from the logical hair splitting of academic philosophy, Stoicism is about living well, with an emphasis on ethics and the attainment of true contentment and excellence of character. So what can Marcus teach us? Since Marcus modeled his behavior according to a hypothetical Stoic ideal, we can all use Marcus’s own character traits as a model for our own character development. In that respect, what follows is a brief summary of the character traits and habits of mind of Marcus Aurelius that we would all benefit from emulating. Marcus's example of kindness actually entails educating the other person in two of the most important strategies he mentioned earlier: Marcus, of course, was not only a Stoic philosopher; he was also a leader, the emperor of Rome. If anyone deserves the title of Plato’s “philosopher king,” it’s Marcus Aurelius, and if any Stoic is truly worth emulating, it’s also probably him.How to think like a Roman emperor breaks downs Aurelius life in different chapters each chapter reflects and pinpoints how Marcus was challenged emotionally and physically during his reign as emperor. It brings in the stoic teachings and shows the reader how Marcus saw and used these methods to overcome some very hard moments in his life but also giving the reader the ability to understand and use it as well in their day to day struggles. The famous Roman statesman and orator Cicero, who lived a couple of generations later, is one of our most important sources for understanding Stoicism. Although he was a follower of the Platonic Academy, Cicero nevertheless knew a great deal about Stoic philosophy and wrote extensively on the subject. On the other hand, his friend and political rival Cato of Utica was a “complete Stoic,” as Cicero puts it, a living example of Stoicism, but didn’t leave any writings about philosophy. After his death, making a stand against the tyrant Julius Caesar during the great Roman civil war, Cato became a hero and an inspiration to later generations of Stoics. This book made me more wary about the right virtues I want to follow in my life. It provided me with numerous techniques which can prevent me from being angry or help me conquer my desires. It made me think more rationally about events but mainly about people whom I don't agree with. I am not going to think less of them (I hope), but rather I will try to know their intentions and life better. Since completing his journal of reflections on philosophy several years earlier, Marcus has been passing through the final stage of a lifelong spiritual journey. Now lying in pain and discomfort, nearing the end, he gently reminds himself that he has already died many times along the way. First of all, Marcus the child died as he entered the imperial palace as heir to the throne, assuming the title Caesar after Hadrian passed away. After Antoninus passed away, Marcus the young Caesar had to die when he took his place as emperor of Rome. Leaving Rome behind to take command of the northern legions during the Marcomannic Wars signaled another death: a transition to a life of warfare and a sojourn in a foreign land. Now, as an old man, he faces his death not for the first time but for the last. From the moment we’re born we’re constantly dying, not only with each stage of life but also one day at a time. Our bodies are no longer the ones to which our mothers gave birth, as Marcus put it. Nobody is the same person he was yesterday. Realizing this makes it easier to let go: we can no more hold on to life than grasp the waters of a rushing stream. Remembering that other people are human, and flawed can help you to receive criticism (or praise) from them in a more balanced and less emotional way.

The main antidote to anger for Marcus is the Stoic virtue of kindness, which along with fairness makes up the cardinal social virtue of justice. Kindness is essentially goodwill toward others and the desire to help them. Donald Robertson took an old topic and breathed new life into it creating a truly unique brew - kind of a modern-day antidote to confusion and anxiety. And I'm hooked on the topic of Stoic philosophy. Each chapter has a central theme that is illustrated using examples from Aurelius' life. Such themes include anger management, dealing with chronic pain, and changing bad habits. After the initial historical account, most chapters then move into a practical "how-to" sort of discussion that includes a lot of numbered lists. Many chapters conclude with a summary of the key points that the author intended for the reader to takeaway from the chapter. I appreciated this strong organizational structure. Donald Robertson, a cognitive-behavioural psychotherapist, looks at how the writing in the mediations can be seen as a premodern version of the psychological strategy. For Stoics, kindness first means educating others or wishing they would become wise, free from vice and passion. It's a desire to turn enemies into friends, fate permitting.Most new Stoicism books tend to be quasi-historic at best and pseudohistoric at worst, presenting dubious interpretation of selective facts only to suit their personal understanding of Stoicism. Since Donald Robertson was a psychotherapist I was genuinely worried that this is going to be the case here and in the end was pleasantly surprised by the amount of research and respect for the historical approach. The book has a perspective, but is written in an intelligent and accurate manner.